Category Archives: Uncategorized

Baby strollers with slicks instead of knobbies!  The 2015 PFD application closing!  Toe shoes!  Muddy trails!  That sweet sweet break up stench!  Bear plugs! Is it a Pesach plague or a sign that winter is finally over?

Who: Sandy Hook and George Jake
What: #32 Hair Substitute
When: Saturday 4 April 2015 1330 Hares away 1400
Where: Margaret Egan Sullivan Park (Westchester Lagoon)
Why: The salmon aren’t running yet and there isn’t enough snow to ski.

Shiggy level 3-4 out of 5 green hoodies.

Expect hares to be laying eggs as its that time of hear for rabbits to do that.

Trail is A-A with outdoor circle on the inlet.  ID: No Dogs: YES.  Hash cash is only $5.

Note the time change.  Something about hares something adulting something needing half an hour to drive across town something.

Monday 30 March 1800

Blue Fox

Agenda: Next Trail

Harriettes and Harriers,

Bust out your ice skates for the first B2H3 Ice Mile and Ice 40k.  What’s an Ice Mile you ask?  (Thanks for asking!) A regular Beer Mile has you drink a beer, run a quarter mile, drink a beer, run a quarter mile, etc. until you’ve run 1 mile. http://www.beermile.com/

But since we’re hashers and this is Alaska and we don’t like doing anything the easy way… we’re going to do it on ice skates.  Chug a beer, skate a lap, etc.

For the more mentally challenged and racist, there is the Ice 40k.  Think 4×40 where instead of drinking a beer, you drink a sweet, sweet 40oz bottle of malt liquor.  Then Skate. And repeat until someone points out that you’ve made a horrible mistake.  You MUST RSVP for the 40k.

Who: Uncle Bondage, Esq., The Nut Wrangler, and Strummin N Cummin
What: IceMile and Ice40k
When: Saturday 21 March 2015 13:00 hash time
Where: Westchester Lagoon
Why: um, I really can’t think of a good reason not to do this

Trail: A-A Dogs: Yes ID: No.

Hash Cash is $5.  40K is $10.

If someone has some firewood and a burn barrel we can have circle out on the little island.

Bear Bottom Hash House Harriers welcomes its newest named member, Sandy Hook!

Welcum mushers and mushettes! Thank you for traveling all the way to Los Anchorage for the ceremonial start of the Ididahash, an entirely fake hash event (this year) that runs a 1000 mile true trail of flour and sacred nectar out to Nome. We’ve spent the last several weeks flying out to the Interior and Western Alaska dropping off caches of colored flour, beer, and jello shots for the hares to pickup along the way. As you all know this is an entirely live haring kennel, so this sort of staging is critical to ensuring a fun and absurd endurance hash. We expect to have the pack on trail for 35 days, hangovers be damned.

THIS WEEK is the ceremonial start of the Ididahash for those of you who can’t commit to hashing all the way to Nome. Come out for a shorter version that doesn’t leave town. Red Blood and Nipples are going to lead us on a romp through town which will undoubtedly cross some of the historic Iditarod trail. Expect other bigger angrier dogs on trail, so leave yours at home for everyone’s safety.

Who: Red Blood Gives You Wings and Unholy Nipples
What: #29 Ididahash Ceremonial Start
When: Saturday 7 March 2015 13:00. Hares away 13:30
Where: Blue Fox Cocktail Lounge
Why: Because the trail to Nome is long and cold without plenty of beer and snuggling

Trail: A-A ID: Circle only Dogs: NO.

Hash Cash is always $5

Don’t forget that http://greatalaskainterhash.com/ is coming. Rego has already gone up, but you were waiting to pay more because it’s going to a good cause anyway.

Attention patch whores: the Incredibly personalized Hashmukkah patches are finally finished. Each patch tells your story of the 8 trails of Hashmukkah. Everyone gets the bear and the head (WSH?) hare. You get an orange background and a hare for each trail that you ran. If you were the hare that day it’s a gold background and border. If you can’t make it to trail or if you have quit the state, contact me and I’ll make arrangements to get your patch to you.

-Uncle B

Dear Harriers and Harriettes,
As you can see the list of hares for the next two months of trails is woefully understocked. Please reach deep into your bag of flour and throw a little hash on trail for one of the upcoming runs. Don’t think that you need to do it alone either. Co-hares are welcome. If you want a co-hare, but don’t have one in mind, we can help with that too.

1/24/15 South Red Blood Gives You Wings
2/7/15 West Uncle Bondage, Esq.
2/21/14 North Unholy Nipples, Red Blood, and Moose Maggot
3/7/15 East I’d Fuck Me
3/21/15 South Dr. Penis Venkman – Fist Anal Bare Bear Beer Run!

Howdy harriers and harriettes!  The Great Alaska Interhash site is finally live (even if sparsely populated).  It contains nearly all the information you need right this second, which is to say:

Where: Anchorage
When: June 17-21, 2015
HashCash: $69 until 2/14 and $80 afterwards.

A2H3’s Red Dress Run and Bear Bottom’s Ball Buster will be included along with what ever trails get hammered out.

REGO NOW! http://greatalaskainterhash.com

12 Trails of Hashmas BEARLINE

12/26 Friday (South) – Dr. Penis Venkman
12/27 Saturday (West) – The Nut Wrangler
12/28 Sunday (North) – Red Blood Gives You Wings
12/29 Monday (East) – Uncle Bondage, Esq.
12/30 Tuesday (South) – Unholy Nipples
12/31 Wednesday (West) – Just Jason
1/1 Thursday (North) – Red Blood Gives You Wings & Mandingo Massacre
1/2 Friday (East) – Mandingo Massacre
1/3 Saturday – BYE TRAIL – A2H3 “Ruin Your Resolutions”
1/4 Sunday (South) – Donnie The Retard
1/5 Monday (West) – Minnesota Goat Fucker
1/6 Tuesday (North) – Dr. Penis Venkman

Support your other other Anchorage kennel by signing up for a trail!

Thanks to Unholy Nipples, Donnie The Retard, Takes a Bigger Cock, Struggle Snuggle, Stretch AssStrong, Just Sarah 8Toes, Just Cool Hand Luke (Our Beloved GM), and Dr. Penis Venkman for joining the festivities of hash for the first night run around Resolution Park.

Hope y’all are ready for 7 more great trails!

Wed 12/17  – 2nd Night: Minnesota Goat Fucker – 4300 Boniface Parkway 99504
Thu 12/18 – 3rd Night: Donnie The Retard – Ocean View Park, Jarvi Drive Side. GPS: 61.0982192,-149.8603216
Fri 12/19 – 4th Night: Unholy Nipples – Fred Meyers near Victor Road
Sat 12/20 – 5th Night: BYE NIGHT  – A2’s 12 Beer Checks of Hashmas
Sun 12/21 – 6th Night: I’d Fuck Me – LOCATION TBD
Mon 12/22 – 7th Night: Dr. Penis Venkman – LOCATION TBD
Tue 12/23 – 8th Night: Uncle Bondage, Esq. – LOCATION TBD ***Circle to follow***

-Uncle Bondage, Esq.
On-Sec, Idiot Hare