Bear Bottom Hash House Harriers

If you didn’t happen to notice that the mountains are covered in that T-Dust, you’re either Outside or spending too much time indoors.  Saturday is a hashing day so take the time to come out and experience the 12 minutes of fall we are going to have.

Who: Does the Finger Count? and Dr. Penis Venkman
What: Lets Get Vertical
When: Saturday 5 September 13:00 Hares Away 13:30
Where: 7400 Campbell Airstrip Rd Anchorage AK 99507 United States
Why: To acquire a great thirst and satisfy it with beer

Trail will be A-A, Dog YES, ID NO, Strollers NOT RECOMMENDED

Look at me.  I design coastlines.  I got an award for Norway. I’ve been doing fjords all my life.  For a fleeting moment they become fashionable and I get a major award.

Who: Hashers, Virgins, Hitchhikers, 42, and the like.  And the hares (and the hares) Donnie and Makes Muff Choke.
What: 42
When: 42 – I mean, 1300, H/A 1330
Where: Back lot of South Anchorage Sports Park (the dirt lot)
If you need an addy, it’s 42, err, 789 W Klatt Rd, Anchorage, AK 99515
Why: 42

Notes, rumors, and lies.
Trail will be A-B, a shuttle will be provided.  No ID necessary for trail, possibly for an on after.  Dogs are okay if they can follow directions and not run into traffic – a bit of this trail is BVFC.  Strollers – god no. Kids in packs and on foot are okay. Forty Two.  Also, don’t forget your towel.  Hash cash is always $5

70 years ago Saturday Fat Man was unleashed in the second live target atomic weapons test over Nagasaki, Japan, in an hare brained attempt to scare the Soviets away from eastern Europe.  Turns out it wasn’t a great plan.  So to commemorate making bad decisions and getting bombed, let’s go hashing!

WHO: Struggle Snuggle
WHAT: B2H3 #42
WHEN: Saturday 8 August 1300 HA 1330
WHERE: Cheney Lake Park approximately 2377 Baxter Road
WHY:  Because sake is delicious and has magical powers to make me attractive

A-A; Dogs YES!; Strollers NO!; ID NO! Hash Cash is always $5

Upcumming trails:
Since your name isn’t Donnie the Retard, you haven’t hared recently.  I know you’re clamoring to lay some sweet trail. Pick a date and let me know!  Need a name?  Best sign up, someone will help you out.

8/22/15 EAST HARES NEEDED
9/5/15 SOUTH Donnie the Retard
9/12/15 B2 Invades WhitehorseH4 Travel Hash
9/19/15 B2 Invades Chena Hotsprings Travel Hash
10/3/15 NORTH Donnie the Retard
10/17/15 EAST HARES NEEDED
10/31/15 H0LoWEEN! Ho White and the 7 Dwarfs

Psssst.  A2H3’s anal camp hash is this weekend.  Don’t tell them, but we’re going to invade with shenanigans of our own.

WHO: Uncle Bondage, Esq.
WHAT: B2 #40 – The Eklutna Invasion
WHEN: Saturday 25 July 2015 @ 10:00 Hares at 10:30
WHERE: 61.409340, -149.176390*
WHY: More trails for all the hashers!

Notes: Trail is A-A.  Dogs: yes.  ID: No.  Hash Cash is only $**

*Head up the Glenn Highway to the Eklutna Lake exit.  Travel down Eklutna Lake Road until you SEE the park entrance booth.  Immediately BEFORE the booth, there is a gate on the right.  Follow that road around.  You should cross two rivers and end up in an open gravel area filled with half naked hungover people you have a vague recollection of meeting at some point.  Feed them beer and they will not eat your brains.  Much. https://goo.gl/maps/z3wq4

**If you aren’t going to Camp Hash, you can still come out for this trail.  Hash Cash is $5.  If you stay for anything else you gotta pony up for the rest of the day – $20 but you get no swag.  If you rego’d for the rest of the event, this trail is included.  REGO FOR CAMP HASH NOW! http://mkt.com/anchorage-alaska-hash-house-harriers/camp-hash

Our dear Nurse is headed south.  Way far south.  Below the border even.  She has kindly invited all of us out to send her off with an extraordinary travel hash adventure from Cooper Landing to Hope.  It seems that she’s been doing this for years and only just got around to inviting us, but we love her anyway.  Cum send her off (and rub eggs in Uncle B’s head ((WSH)).

WHO: Nurse Crotchette and Uncle Bondage
WHAT: Travel Hash Weekend in Hope
WHEN: June 26-28
WHERE: Hope, Alaska
WHY: Because Hope is open.  There’s drinking and dancing and hashing to be had.

26 June
Bike Friday Devils pass to Hope. No longer to Cooper Landing d/t fire closure. Camp friday night hope in front of Seaview inn, or down road at campground. No tents allowed in campground down the road d/t bear activities. Yes in front of Seaview Inn

27 June
Saturday: 9 am raft 6 mile. Meet at Hope/Seward Highway junction. Head south on Seward, and take a right onto Hope road. Meeting point is on right side about 100 feet. You will see the NOVA truck.  YOU MUST HAVE ALREADY RSVP’D FOR RAFTING.

7pm meet in front of Seaview inn Hope for beginning of Hashing Trail run/walk. Guaranteed debauchery and fun.

28 June
Sunday about 10 ish… wake up and hike to the topaz alpine Twin Lakes out of Hope.
Plan to camp hope Friday and sat night. 10 bucks per tent. 6 bucks per car camp.

It’s nearly 0200 and I’m just getting around to laying out the trail details because I know you’ve  been up for the last two nights listless at that lack of certainty over your plans for the upcumming week end.  There’s plenty of time for fishing, but there’s only one Saturday left before Interhash.  The highest and best use of your time?  That’s right! Hashing a B2 trail!

WHO: I’d Fuck Me
WHAT: #36: Fuck Me 2 The Future (North side)
WHEN: Saturday 13 June 1300 HA 1330
WHERE: Davis Park 5081 Mountain View Drive 99508WHY: The opportunity to get shivved in the shiggy or pickup a sweet Article 15 Patch for crossing that blue line!

Trail is A-A.  Dog Friendly. ID is ALWAYS a wise precaution.  Hash Cash is always $5.

It was a scant 77 trails ago that I’d Fuck Me and Donnie the Retard joined the ranks of half-minds dedicated to confusing, misleading, and otherwise annoying the pack who only wanted to go and find a beer.  Today they back at their shenanigans on the west side of town trying to make sure you can get a down-down-down-down (why are we waiting…)

WHO: I’d Fuck Me & Donnie the Retard
WHAT: 40 pounds of flour and 77 trails ago…
WHEN: Saturday 30 May 1300 (HA 1330)
WHERE: Earthquake Park
WHY: Because they love you and want you to be happy!

Trail is A-B; Dogs ok on trail.  ID is required.  Shiggy 3 of 5.  Hash cash is always $5.

Ahoy Harriers and Harriettes!
Bare all for the first anal bear bottom bear run. It’s time to party like it’s 1915. Don your finest union suit (You primed that shit right?) and prepare to get shiggy with Dr. Penis Venkman and Uncle Bondage, Esq.

WHO: All y’all
WHAT: The Anal Bear Run
WHEN: 5/16 at 13:00 (Hare away at 13:30).
WHERE: Campbell Creek Park
2499 E 48th Ave
Anchorage, AK 99507
Trail: A-B  Dogs: NO ID: YES

Hash cash is always $5.

Always a good idea to get the hares to commit to where trail start is before the On-Sec sends out an email.  Commit twice if the On-Sec is a hare.  Also a good idea to not let the On-sec near a keyboard sober.  Mostly.

First Anal Bear Run! On 16 May the half-minds who brought you the Bear Bottoms are bringing you out on the town. Spin up that Amazon prime and find a RED union suit for a down town pub run. Real details to follow, but get that suit. Misspelling is fine if you don’t like being told what to do. Consider what that means if you’re going on a bare run.